I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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