last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize