some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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