You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
