Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
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