So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Randomize