at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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