your parents love me but you hate me
This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
