she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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