In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
