Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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