So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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