We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
