Duck Duck Cougar?
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize