The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
