what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Randomize
