Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize
