Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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