It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Randomize
