so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
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