we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
