Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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