I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Green mimosas i think yes
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
