State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
