I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
