stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
