Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
