If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
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Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
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The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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