kristin has been a bad kristin
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
