I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Is Oprah even human
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
