Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
