Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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