Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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