woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
