yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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