Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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