You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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