do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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