Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize