Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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