I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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