This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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