..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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