i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
