i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
