Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
