I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize