I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
