Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
is it fun? or sober?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize