idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
